Rev Cat

Did I Miss Your Call?


I like to think my brain is more sophisticated than a rat’s, but sometimes I’m not so sure.

In the same way that rats keep pushing a lever that, maybe once in 20 times, releases a food pellet, I have kept living with a phone that rings about the same percentage of the time when a call is coming in.

I alternately told myself that 1) it isn’t really broken because sometimes it works, and 2) it so uniquely and bizarrely broken that Apple cannot possibly figure it out.

Finally fed up with the irritation I called Apple, and after a long time of waiting on hold to darkly portentous classical music (Earth to Apple: people who like classical music do not ONLY listen to Wagner) I got a cheery advisor on the line who fixed the problem in one minute. Turns out I had inadvertently turned on Do Not Disturb, which means the phone only rings if I happen to be already using it when someone calls. Oh.

But however often I do this? We limp along with things, sometimes small, sometimes the big things – relationships, jobs, home services – partly because we are used to them and partly because occasionally they work for us. Once in awhile they are not terrible.

 It takes a toll.

I had never really thought about this, but it’s fairly shocking to me to think about how often accepting and rationalizing what is only occasionally workable has been a feature of my life.

That is not the awakened and empowered life I’m interested in now. I want more for myself, and I certainly want more for you.

I’m setting an intention to notice when I start minimizing what doesn’t work. Clearing the obstacles won’t always be as fast as my one minute with the Apple advisor, but if something is an ongoing feature of my life, it certainly is worth the investment of my time.


With You on the Path,

Rev. Cat



What are you just “limping along” with?

What would it take for you to gather yourself to make a change?

How much Wagner are you willing to listen to if they put you on hold?


One thought on “Did I Miss Your Call?

  1. tracy avent-costanza

    i was “ghosted” (yeah, it’s a word and apparently a THING) by someone I considered a close friend of over 20 years. She just stopped talking to me, and somewhere in the mix, not only blocked and un-friended me on facebook, but apparently deleted MONTHS of discussion text- both on threads and messenger. Huffpost has some articles on this phenomenon and points out that often the ghostee does not even immediately KNOW that this has happened. In my case it took a couple of months to be certain, and the point where it happened is still unclear. It was approximately september of 2011 which is now a while ago.

    I was devastated by this. In the meantime my brother came down with massive cancer and died. That whole thing actually bothers me LESS, probably because I KNEW WHAT HAPPENED. The ghosting thing…is rife with unknowns and I’ve been in therapy about it for almost two years now. Probably should have started that therapy sooner.

    Regarding the “change” question, that is happening whether I want it or not. Claire and I both were handed our walking papers by corporate america during 2017. Fortunately We had made some fairly good investment decisions while we were working, so it turns out we really don’t have to look for other jobs if we play our financial cards right (and the investment markets do not implode). So among the changes are those pertaining to lifestyle, medical coverage, and deciding where to live for the next thirty years or so, since we no longer have a strong reason to remain near silicon valley.

    Regarding the Wagner question: I could probably listen to “ride of the valkyeries” a time or two but after that it would get old.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *